Building Relationships with Students

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 As a teacher you are often also take on the role of- counselor, mentor, friend, parent, guide, and social worker. The key similarity of all of these roles is the importance of creating connection with students & developing a relationship with others. 

I didn't know that relationship building was such an important part of being a teacher until I had a classroom of my own. 
Last year I had a group of students that I bonded with quickly and easily- we had a lot in common and had similar family/life backgrounds. I was really lucky to share my interests of Pokemon Go, music, and TV shows with a majority of my students. We had so much fun laughing together and I had a group of sweet helpers who liked spending their recesses with me so we could hang out. My class last year was the group that taught me the "heart" of teaching. 
This year I have a much more difficult group students. It is not that they don't have their charm- they really do, but most of students have had more difficult lives and as a result exhibit behaviors like cursing, throwing things around the room, and screaming. At the beginning of the year I frequently felt overwhelmed by their behavior. I developed a relationship with my particularly difficult student by spending my prep time and recess time with him. At first he would cover his ears and yell, but he must have heard me because over time we developed a relationship of trust (with the help of his favorite snack- Takis). 
Ways to Develop Relationships With Your Students
  • Community Time- I start every day with community time. We put our chairs into a circle and as a class share parts of our weekend, responses to funny questions or prompts, and work out problems that our class is facing. 
    • Here is an article with more information on how you can start community time LINK
    • I use these prompts from "Upper Elementary Adventures" for community meeting 
  • Lunch Bunch/Eat lunch with your students- I give away lunch time with the teacher coupons as a prize for my class. We will eat, talk, watch Netflix, dance, and laugh during lunch bunches. Kids LOVE these - they are a free prize and give you a chance outside of the class time to get to know your students. I sometimes also eat in the cafeteria with my class as a way to spend time outside of the classroom with my kids. 
  • Ask a teacher friend to watch your class while you have a conversation with students. I will sometimes call the SPED teacher or admin to come watch my class so I can talk with a student who is displaying difficult behavior or having a rough day. It lets your student know you care, holds them accountable for their actions, and gives your private time with that student. 
  • Have a talk with a student during your specialist, recess, or lunch time. It is hard to give up cherished prep time but spending time just talking to a student is important. 
  • Build a relationship with families. I email my families a weekly email each week to let them know what we are learning, homework / classwork assignments, and events going on at school. It doesn't have to be fancy- my emails are mainly bullet points, but you could also buy cool looking template online. I also send emails to families or try to catch them afterschool if their student is struggling. *Tip: If you are telling parents something negative - try to pair it with a positive noticing about their student. 

Relationships do not happen overnight. Relationships don't happen if you don't make time to cultivate them and nourish them. Even students that you've worked with will have difficult days, but don't give up! 






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